Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Dealing with Difficult People Speaker: Handling Screamers and Yellers While Staying Cool

Screamers think by yelling they can get their point across, but primarily point out they are out of control and socially incapable of carrying themselves appropriately.

I enjoyed Oprah's interview with President Obama and first lady Michelle Obama, during which Pres. Obama said, "I don't yell. When I'm not happy I express my displeasure by speaking more crisply and thereby get my point across. I find that yelling doesn't work and in fact is less effective."

Handle yellers and screamers by:

1. Leaving the room and waiting until they cool down.
2. Ask them why they feel it is important to yell.
3. Inform them that you will NOT communicate with them while they are yelling.
4. If they continue yelling thereafter, remove them from your life until they can apologize and get themselves together (perhaps with some counseling and therapy).
5. Refuse to cave or emotionally be manipulated by the screamer given to yelling.
6. Hold strong to your values and convictions, despite the present volume that causes you internal disruption and would seek to break your focus.
7. Write the screamer and yeller a letter to hold true to your stance and opinion on the matter, while not subjecting yourself to their overbearing volume and cry baby tactics. - worldwide speaker, life coach and author


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