Sunday, December 20, 2009

Dealing with Difficult People Speaker: Jealous, Envious and Adversarial Relationships

It never ceases to amaze me how mixed up internally people are and how clueless they are to the subconscious within that suddenly releases the inner emotions bottled up in a moment in time when they least expect it.

I recall one young lady I dated who struggled immensely with jealousy and envy. When I brought to her a blessing, she immediately turned it into a curse.

I invited her to go with me and another couple on a snow skiing trip. Instead of rejoicing and celebrating over the invitation, she immediately inwardly began comparing herself with the other young lady my friend is married to.

"She is so sweet. I will kill her." my former girlfriend said.

I replied, "Is that you speaking or the devil in you?"

"Jesus said, 'The devil comes to kill, steal and destroy...' (John 10:10). Are you working for Satan now?"

How is it a precious blessing can so easily be flipped, reframed, negatively received and turned into a curse?

It is because the person receiving the stimuli has a messed up computer atop their shoulders and is terribly insecure within. Hence instead of rejoicing with others, they are quick to compare and size others up in hopes of somehow elevating themselves.

This adversarial posturing is unhealthy and socially devasting. No wonder this ex-girlfriend of mine had so few friends.

It is hard to make and keep friends when you are too busy inwardly competing and comparing yourself to them. Break out of that insecurity and rut to rejoice with others, be fully present and enjoy the moment.

Life is not meant to be a continual competition, but a cooperative celebration! worldwide speaker on dealing with difficult people and conflict resolution

Paul F. Davis is the author of 17 books and a worldwide speaker who has touched over 55 countries & 6 continents building bridges cross-culturally by joyfully disarming and empowering people throughout the earth to live their dreams!

Paul’s incredible depth and powerful stories from around the world, entertain and inspire audiences making Paul a captivating speaker able to awaken the greatness within us all.

Paul speaks for Celebrity Cruises and has appeared on numerous international broadcasts from Investors Business Daily, Oprah & Friends to Fox News to talk about success, leadership, relational intricacies, conflict resolution, life balance, and living your dreams. By reason of his global travels, Paul is a highly sought after diversity and multicultural awareness speaker.

Playboy Radio Afternoon Advice host Tiffany Granath calls Paul an awesome relational coach and recommends his books on love, dating, and sexuality.

Paul worked at Ground Zero in NYC during 9-11; helped rebuild a home at the tsunami epicenter; comforted victims of genocide in Rwanda; spoke to leaders in East Timor during the war; inspired students & monks in Myanmar; promoted peace & reconciliation in Pakistan; and has been so deep into the bush of rural Africa where villagers had never before seen a white man.

A breakthrough leader, Paul humorously and elegantly transforms individuals and organizations, while empowering people to love passionately and fearlessly live their dreams.

Diversity & Multiculturalism Speaker

Healthy Relationships Speaker at Fordham College

Overcoming Adversity - Be Empowered to Live Victoriously

Empowering & Liberating Women to Achieve Greatness

Relationships Speaker for a Broken Heart

Substance Abuse Prevention & Drunk Driving Detour

World Peace Over Propaganda & Demonizing Nations

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